Monday, September 28, 2009
Then I went to his room to check.
Mommy: “Gregory what did you do with your dirty clothes?”
Gregory: “I put them in the hamper.”
Mommy: Talking in a serious voice “Gregory why did you do that?”
Gregory: Sounding worried “So they get washed.”
Mommy: Still serious: “Why did you do that?”
Gregory: “Ah…I, I.” Starting to back up and sounds worried.
Mommy: “You did it because you are a good boy!”
Gregory” Sounds relieved and giggles “Mommy you are so silly.”
092809 Gregory and Bot5
Originally uploaded by smileahug.
Gregory has found a friend two houses down. It is great. The little boy is older by a half of a year, but Gregory is a half of a foot taller. Gregory is very tall for his age. They play together almost every day. At times I watch the boys and other times Gregory’s friend’s mom watches them. It gives both us moms a break. I also spend some time talking with his mom. She is very nice. The only thing is she isn’t from the US and so her English isn’t the best. It is sometimes hard to find things to talk about, but I think it is like that when you meet most people. I am just happy that Gregory has a playmate.
This week also has been better as far as Gregory’s behavior goes. He has been helping out around the house and hasn’t thrown as many tantrums. I am thankful. I am hoping age four will be much easier than three.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Monday, September 21, 2009
092009 Gregory and cake
Originally uploaded by smileahug.
Today is his birthday.
Gregory is now FOUR!
He may be a handful at times, well most times, but he is as loveable as ever.
I am so glad to have him in my life.
We had a little party for him last night.
It was just Mommy, Daddy, Lucy, and the birthday boy.
I do think he had fun.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
That did it. I had had too much this week.
I cleaned the mess the best I could.
Gregory is now in fresh pajamas and is in bed. I left him only with some books and his bear. I don’t know how long I will leave him there.
I don’t know what to do to get through to him. So after I fix lunch he will be back in his room.
The little time outs are not working, so hopefully a big one will make the difference.
He knows better.
Gregory’s 4th birthday is on Monday. I am hoping he will be good, because I want him to have a happy birthday. He won’t be getting his gifts on a day where he acts up.
Now to find a parenting manual. Anyone have one I can borrow? Just kidding, I am sure it wouldn’t work for my stubborn child.
I love him so much, but boy he sure knows what to do to give mommy a headache.
Friday, September 18, 2009
Thursday, September 17, 2009
I bought Cullen’s birthday present a month early. His birthday is October 30, but I knew he needed some new work shirts. So, I ordered them online and they came in yesterday. He is so excited to have some nice work shirts to wear. The thing is that I can’t get Cullen to go clothes shopping for himself. Today he came home with a new shirt for me. It was a surprise. I was very pleased. What he really needed to be shopping for was himself. He needs some new work pants. He likes shopping as long as it is not for himself. What I should say is he likes shopping for himself as long as it is not for clothes. Let him pick out electronics any day and he will be happy. I think that is a very man like quality. It is funny how guys have so much in common. Certain things just fit within a stereotype.
Today was Cullen’s day off. He took Gregory out to the store this morning. He came home with a few surprises. We spent some time at home and even went for a walk. Then we went out together to another store. We walked and looked and picked up a few necessary items of the food variety.
The time at home was a bit difficult, because of Gregory. I do love that child. He can be so incredibly sweet. Then there are weeks like this one where every day has tantrums. I think I need to get his ears checked, because he just isn’t listening. I don’t know what to do. I think he is going through a phase or something. It is at the point where I feel like just giving up and telling him you win and now you can stop throwing a fit. That would be the easy way. Yes anything you want little monster. No, I can’t do that because I love my hard headed wonderful child. He is just very determined. That is a good quality. That means he will be able to do anything he sets his mind to. I just hope I will live through this to see that. Gregory will grow up and so things will change.
I recently read the popular Twilight series. I thought the books were pretty good. Not the best thing I ever read, but not bad. The books got me thinking about life. The main character Bella fears growing old. I definitely can say that I don’t fear that. I actually thought about not growing old like the characters in the book. The idea seems like it would be a nightmare. Not getting older seems quite awful to me. A person grows and changes, life changes, the world changes, and I would hate to be stuck at any age. I feel like I have yet to experience the best years of my life. My life keeps getting better as the years pass. When I was 18 my body was very nice. I have now had two children and I am 27 years old. I am not as thin as I was. I am not as toned as I was. I sag a bit in places. I have many more gray hairs than I did when I was 18. My body is not the way it once was. I no longer have the perfection that only a teenage body can have. Well, I am not a teenager. I am in my late twenties. Hum, late twenties, that sounds so weird. Time has passed by so quickly. To tell you the truth I have never felt so beautiful.
Like most people I notice most of my flaws and magnify them, but I am ok with them. I still have ten pounds of baby weight to lose. I want to lose it, but secretly the little extra makes me feel a bit more beautiful. This statement doesn’t make much sense, but lots of things don’t make sense. It is just my feeling. I do complain like most people, but overall I feel good about my body.
I feel good about my life too. This however I have more troubles with. Since I was a teenager I have had problems with anxiety and depression problems. My parents divorce and my loss of my vision contributed to this. I have moved on and many of the things that once bothered me no longer do, but other life challenges have crept in. Family still is a big contributor. I have been doing better. I just have to keep reminding myself I can not control the decisions that members of my family make. They are their decisions to make and not mine. Even if I know their decision is a bad one. I only have control of my decisions.
My blindness still is a big contributor. There are just some things I can not do and that I never will be able to. I need help and that is ok. Although, many days I feel like me needing help is not ok. I just want to do it my self. I want to read my mail, but I can’t read my mail. I can’t do the bills all by myself. I need help and it is ok, even on days when I feel like it is not. Gregory gets away with more than he should some days, because I can not tell what he is doing. Not knowing that Gregory took a dry erase marker to the wall makes me very frustrated. I can not discipline him for something that I didn’t realize he did. There are so many other little things that frustrate me that would be so easy if I could just see. Most of the time I let them go. I have problems when they start to build. Then life gets to be too much and all the things that were once easy are now as hard as climbing a mountain.
I just have to remember to breathe and that the world isn’t ending tomorrow and even if it was I probably wouldn’t be able to do anything about that. So, I should just live happy. You know get up off my butt, drink my coffee, and take care of myself, my husband, my kids, and my home. Oh and the birds.
The thing that makes it easier to get up is that I have so many things to be thankful for. My children, no matter if they are crying or throwing a fit. Their smiles and laughter are the greatest thing. My husband, no matter if his memory is fried at times, cares for me deeply and I know he loves me very much. The birds little twittering makes the house seem happy. The home that is not a cardboard box and we have such a lovely place to live. The car, even though I can’t drive it, it gets us places. The job Cullen has, because I enjoy eating, clothes, being able to go the doctor, and so many other things that money can buy. We are all healthy. I do get many many headaches, migraines, sinus, tension, at least two a week (usually more than that). I am happy though that they are only headaches and thankful for the few days I am pain free.
When I feel down it is sometimes hard to remember all the great things. I just have to keep remembering.
And now I feel better, goodnight
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
-Gregory is not sitting on the toilet seat when he poops. He is sitting on the toilet rim. He gets wet, yuck! Every time I have to tell him again where he should sit.
-I have been having anxiety attacks.
-Gregory has been throwing lots of tantrums and has not been listening. I am being consistent, but I wish he would get over it. He knows the consequences and knows I will follow through, but it doesn’t seem to matter. He will stand in the corner and cry and scream. I will leave him there till he calms down, but it grates on my nerves. I don’t know what else to do, but he needs to listen to me. He ends up in the corner at least three times a day. Each time he acts like he is being tortured. Oh and when we are in public and I make him hold my hand he says I am hurting him. He says this also when he is in the shopping cart and noone is even touching him. I don’t know what to do. I am sure eventually he will get over it. I am hoping.
-When Lucy is crying and I am sitting taking a minute for myself I don’t want to get up.
-I need some time to not think about anyone, but myself.
-I am tired. I am overwhelmed. I am feeling a huge range of emotions.
-I also feel like my life is wonderful. I really don’t understand myself sometimes.
-Thank goodness tomorrow will be different, hopefully in a good way.
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Mommy – “Go watch TV I will get it for you in a minute” (I was still in bed)
Gregory – (goes away)
Ten minutes later
Mommy – wondering why Gregory hasn’t come back to ask for cereal again, gets up and finds Gregory watching TV with the last of the cinnamon rolls.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
I have laundry to put away. I don’t know how I didn’t get around to doing that. I didn’t rest today. Let me see. I am just going to write a list of what I did today.
Get Gregory dressed
Get cereal for Gregory and me
Books and play with Gregory
Nurse, change, and put Lucy on floor to roll around
Talk to my mom
Look up information online to determine when Gregory starts kindergarten
Find out he will make the cut off and he will start next year
Look up information on line about preschool
Make phone calls about preschool
Play Legos with Gregory
Make a few more calls about preschool
Set Lucy down.
Practice letters with Gregory
Have Gregory write his name (took over a half hour)
Draw with Gregory
Look up the dinner menu
Take Gregory out to play
Follow Gregory around with Lucy in front carrier
Pray Gregory doesn’t get a concussion, because of his clumsiness
Tell Gregory to go play
Start cooking dinner
Tell Gregory not to touch stove
Turn on TV for Gregory so he stays out of kitchen
Clean up as I go
Cullen gets home
Take a bath
(Daddy put Gregory to bed)
Write a post
All those phone calls made it seem like I got nothing accomplished. Oh well there is always tomorrow.
I am tired.
Oh and Lucy slept till 10 am
She has been sleeping 10 hour nights from about midnight till ten.
091009 Gregory wrote his name for first time
Originally uploaded by smileahug.
Gregory will be in kindergarten next year. I figured he should be working on writing his name. He did it today.
Now to figure out if I am sending him to preschool.
The problem is that I would probably have to stay in the building with Lucy during, because I wouldn't be able to get home and back in time by bus. Hum... Something to think about.